I wrote a post last week about how social media can make it seem that everyone lives an entirely one dimensional life. And if you aren't the most extreme version of something, you don't fit in. I.e. you live in a van and hike every day or you work in an office 5 days a week. You are a bookworm or an avid runner, but definitely not both. You get a fresh blowout every week or haven't been to a salon in years. I could go on and on and on. Needless to say, that post really resonated with people so clearly a lot of us are feeling this same pressure to be shoved into a tiny box where our lives are one thing. All in. Nothing else.
Truthfully, living a small one dimensional life is absolutely terrifying for me. I love the consistency of a corporate job, but I also love escaping on adventure as soon as the weekend comes. The balance of growing professionally but also challenging myself outdoors regularly. Putting on a cute WFH outfit (most days) and being a hiking dirtbag from 5pm Friday. I don't think I would be happy being all in on one or the other, even though I do sometimes daydream of living vanlife for a few weeks.
This summer has been super hard on a myriad of levels. The weather was crazy hot and insanely humid for June, July, and most of August making most outdoor time unbearable. Oban has had a cough for nearly 3 months, and was on dozens of pills and daily nebulizer treatments at the vet. I had some health things going on which meant no exercising for a very long time and riding an emotional roller coaster, we're still on the curve of. More to come there at a later date. But during that time I spent a lot of time reflecting on the different versions of ourselves we present to the world. Our outdoor life and travel adventures have always been a huge part of that presentation for me, but without that this summer, I found myself feeling a bit unmoored.
Anxiety has been high with my stuff going on, Oban's lingering cough, uncertainty in nearly all facets of our life. Trying to focus on diving back into cooking and baking which I have always loved. Day tripping to outdoor activities that are less physical, like summer concerts and outdoor markets. Friday evenings on my in-laws deck with a bottle of wine and take out. Exploring those other dimensions of life while hiking life has been put on hold. Being something other than the one thing that seems to have been the focus for so long. It's uncomfortable and uneasy, but when you don't have much of a choice, its this or lay on the couch and feel sorry (which I have definitely spent a few days doing).
Finishing this blog on the first day of autumn, feels particularly poignant. The change of season, leaves turning bright and then letting go. The rest of the year feels quite up in the air in nearly every aspect of life. So here is to leaning in to letting go and letting the leaves fall where they may.
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